A moment to be grateful for

On March 30, 2015, five first-year students were involved in a car accident near campus. Four were hospitalized with a range of injuries. Corey Byrnes died at the scene. A year later, Trinity University paused to recognize the one year anniversary of this tragic day, and dedicate a bench in Corey's honor. The site was selected by his friends near their residence, Calvert Hall. Here are excerpts from the remarks and a video of the fairly brief but moving ceremony is included in this post. (Video by Tim Zhang.)

Dean of Students, David Tuttle
Unfortunately, we have lost students and young alumni before. If you walk this campus you will see their memorials. For all of these young people, their friends and families felt it was important to have a market, somewhere here, that expressed that these young people lived here, learned here, studied here, played here, and mattered here. What an incredible honor it is for us as a campus to celebrate their lives in these tangible memorials that reflect how much they mattered to us too. When we pass this spot and when you come back to visit as alumni, you will reflect on Corey, and his life, and your grief, and how they are inseparable and permanent.

Class of 2018 Alumni Sponsor - Leni Kirkman
I don't want to stand here putting words in the mouth of your dear friend Corey - but I'm pretty sure he's left us a good recipe for living. Putting aside the pains of the past, and our worries for the future - and finding happiness in the present: Easy to say, much harder to do - but I think that is what I will try to do each time I come sit on Corey's bench.

Chaplin, Stephen Nickle

March 30, 2016

We gather on this anniversary of his death feeling a mixture of sadness and glad memories. We gather to dedicate this bench in Corey's memory, to mark in an explicit way our gladness at having journeyed a piece with him, and our sadness at his death. Lord, this memorial bench created a space of rest and encounter: of shared laughter, of honest argument, or trusting vulnerability -- all of which were precious to those who knew Corey, all of which are precious to each of us in many other friendships.

Class of 2018 Class Marshal, Jennifer Henderson
Corey was a student in my first year seminar course - a course on Women and Technology in Media. This is a course he didn't really expect to be taking, but one he was game to dive into. I can see Corey on the left side of the classroom, five seats down. I can see him raising his hand anytime we talked about video games or movies. When I remember Corey, all of the snapshots are of him laughing. Laughing with his friends. Laughing at my inability to get the computer projector to work...again. Laughing at himself. Corey laughed a lot. He laughed easily and sometimes for not outward reason at all.

Kindred Spirits

Drinking buddies.

"People contact me all the time and say 'your story is MY story." So said author Sarah Hepola to a riveted crowd in Laurie Auditorium on Thursday (March 3, 2016) at an event sponsored by the Coalition for Respect and Greek Council. Well, I was thinking the same thing. I have revealed my own drinking history to the campus, first in a 2004 Trinitonian column (that time Spurs owner Peter Holt was the catalyst) and in countless welcome and diversity speeches at New Student Orientation.

I like to talk openly about my dysfunctional family history, my drinking, and my social anxiety. I want students to not see me as a bland and condescending bureaucrat. I want my failures to make me approachable and a safe resource for students when they hit their lows. How can I judge given the things I have done? And there are plenty of adults like me around campus that students should and do look to during their most vulnerable moments. So of course I am drawn to Sarah's candid and blunt accounts of her black-out history. Forgive me for gravy-training.

Sarah's talk triggered a flood of liquid gold memories for me. It has been over 30 years after all, so I don't go back there very often any more, back to the spirits and ghosts. The consistencies between our stories - and apparently the stories of many - are both shocking and yet not at all surprising. I will spare the details of my past, except to say I imposed blackouts on my self nearly every weekend for several years running during college. It didn't stop afterwards, and that's when I knew I wanted to forge a different path for my own yet-to-be-created family.

Dinner with the speaker and Trinity people.

Like Sarah, I felt emboldened by my alcohol use and belittled others as amateurs. Most striking in her speech were these incredible nuggets: knowing from the first time that this was a problem; treating non-drinkers as less-worthy "light-weights;" hiding behind one-night stands and cigarettes as adventurous and cool; and building a drinking identity that masked fears, anxieties, and low self-esteem.

Interesting and sad stories we have to tell. But what is the take-away for our students? Sarah was spot on from the start when she told students that she wouldn't tell them not to drink or drink less - because they probably wouldn't listen. At the end of the day students will make their own choices and take their own risks. And there are lots of risks. What I had in common with Sarah was the fun, exhilaration, transformation, and brazenness alcohol created. How dare either of us serve ourselves up as cautionary tales? The best way is to name it: that if students feel the way we did about their relationship with alcohol, then they should take pause. Serious pause. Look at the full arc of our stories to see the almost cataclysmic results that somehow ended in at least some redemption.

Some of my history guides my thinking in leading policy discussions on campus. The Optimal Buzz and B'Low Optimal programs acknowledge that students will drink but gives them incentive to do so moderately. Currently, we are fully reviewing our off-campus alcohol policies and guidelines with the Athletic Council and Greek Council. (That will be another post altogether.) I anticipate revisions that shift responsibility to individuals more than groups and that further strengthen our commitment to student health and safety above policy enforcement.

Sarah described college as that fun time of freedom between adolescence and adulthood. Why wouldn't students have fun with alcohol? By describing her experiences in Black Out, and taking her story to college students Sarah Hepola is offering up an important and very personal story.

Over dinner with a group of students, staff, and faculty at a local restaurant, Sarah answered questions, spoke with passion and humor, and was candid about her story and the culture of drinking. As our waitress, Amber, thanked us for our business, she revealed, tearfully, that she herself was 263 days sober. "You should listen to her," she said of my new kindred spirit, and hers. "She speaks the truth," said Amber. She does indeed.

What's in a name?

Fall Skyline Room Menu

It all started with Curb Your Enthusiasm. Specifically, there was an episode about a Hollywood deli that named its sandwiches after celebrities. Larry David, creator of Seinfeld and real-life George Costanza, wanted to swap his Larry David sandwich for the Ted Danson. (Hilarious clip contains crude language.)

So why not try named sandwiches here, in the Skyline Room? Our faculty members are our celebrities. So in the fall of 2015 we rolled out a new menu featuring some of our faculty superstars. Bob Blystone, Richard Burr, Bill Christ, Ruben Dupertuis, Coleen Grissom, Paul Myers, and Claudia Stokes all good-naturedly agreed to lend their names to a new spate of sandwiches. Some of the sandwiches were pre-existing. Some were new and customized. Dr. Blystone, for example, was very specific about the sandwich he wanted, which may be why it was almost dropped from the menu.

Indeed, the new chef looked at the menu over break and proposed dropping the Reuben Dupertuis and the Paul Myers from the spring menu. This was nearly a done deal until the serving crew at the Skyline implored me (they actually did), to not drop the Reuben or the Paul Myers. Sure enough, it turns out that the Grissom BLT and the Blystone had the fewest sales. The chef just wanted to rotate out for better variety.

The Bill Christ. Really

Interestingly, when I initially told Ruben Dupertuis that his Reuben was possibly being rotated out... he kind of took it personally. I assured him it was about sales (which turned out to be false). But even that didn't bolster his spirits. He is lobbying for the sandwiches to have tenure so they can never be dropped. He might have a point. I haven't broken it to Coleen Grissom that her BLT is low in sales, but she wouldn't complain. She whines that she wished she was the Claudia Stokes.

This was all a bit more than I bargained for. I was able to convince Dining Services to keep the whole menu, for now, in addition to rotating in the three new sandwiches selected by our new chef. Professors Blystone and Grissom have a reprieve. Paul Myers, indifferent to his sandwich, seems as safe as a Reuben, for at least the spring.

I polled the faculty for nominations to name the new sandwiches and received a robust response. Without further ado, I am pleased to announce the new sandwiches for Spring 2016:

The Brian Miceli Celifornia Chicken Club
Grilled chicken breast with bacon, avocado, lettuce, and tomato on ciabatta.
Brian received several nominations as the ultimate California dude. When I asked him if this would be okay he just said "cool."

The Carolyn True Caprese Sandwich
Fresh mozzarella, tomato, and basil on a ciabatta roll with balsamic pesto dressing.
When I approached her about the Caprese, which does sound musical, she listed all of the ingredients. This is a True match.

The Camille Reyes Cuban Melt
Pulled pork, ham, Swiss cheese, pickles, cabbage, and mustard on a baguette.
Camille is of direct Cuban descent and was so excited to tell her family she is now an American sandwich.

The previously unnamed Pepperoni Flatbread will now be The Mike Wilkins.

Of course Peter Olofsson, Aaron Navarro, and many others provided some interesting suggestions. The response to the sandwiches has been fantastic. The students really love to order their favorite professors. The Skyline use has seen a 125% increase this fall. And the faculty involved have been incredibly great sports. The others who submitted names had fun nominating their friends and colleagues for this honor. This is truly Trinity at its best. And the sandwiches aren't half bad either. I invite readers to check out the expanded menu sometime in late January.

Stolen Endings

Down 31-0 at the half we had seen this story before. TCU trailed Oregon in the 2015 Alamo Bowl in San Antonio, in part, because its star quarterback was suspended. To a handful of people across Texas and the nation, the circumstances were all too familiar. What might have been?

An intoxicated Trevone Boykin snuck out of his hotel after reportedly being tucked in for the night. Then, he found himself in a Riverwalk saloon where words were exchanged, punches were thrown, an arrest was made, and dreams were dashed.

It was December 14, 2002 when Trinity beat up St. John's to advance to the Division III national football championship to take on powerhouse Mount Union. The Amos Alonzo Stagg Bowl was a big deal. Airing on ESPN, it was Trinity's chance to shine on the national stage. Finally. The Tigers were led by Roy Hampton, the brazen gunslinger at quarterback, who led the nation in passing in D-III. If any team would beat this Mount Union team it could be a powerful offense like the Tigers.

Celebrating at a party following the semi-final win, Roy Hampton was passed out, reportedly after being tucked in for the night. Then, he found himself in a Riverwalk saloon where words were exchanged, punches were thrown, an arrest was made, and dreams were dashed.

Trinity went on to play its biggest game on the national stage alright. But it was painful. What might have been? The Tigers went on to lose 48-7. So much more was lost that day then a game, though we got another chance when Trinity again hit the news with its Mississippi Miracle in 2007. Perhaps it was our consolation prize.

Roy Hampton and three others were suspended from Trinity University in October 2001. I remember it well: I suspended them. It was an easy decision. The four students had gotten in a scuffle with a Trinity student at nearby Bombay Bicycle Club. They left and within an hour someone shot a gun at that other student's apartment near the Quarry. A public servant was an eyewitness and later identified the four students as present, both at the initial hearing and then the appeal hearing. The suspension was upheld.

The Tigers were eliminated from the playoffs before the suspension went into effect. It was the only time I cheered against our team. The suspension would likely have taken place sometime before the championship if we would get that far. I didn't want that on me.

As a young Dean, this was my first big test. The victim in the case and his family wanted immediate and harsh justice. Among the four students accused were the nephew of a professor and an African-American student, also on the football team. His family alleged racism on my part. The Trinity uncle naturally put his heart with his family. Attorneys of the students were interviewed on the local TV news. "The Dean of Students served as prosecutor, judge, and jury" groused one. A Web page, mostly trashing me and my investigation sprung up. Calls to my house threatening me to back off didn't help. There was more, and it was messy. It was the worst period of my professional life. The Faculty Senate would ultimately move to strip authority from the Dean of Students to make uni-lateral decisions in cases. As a result, the Dean is the least powerful person on campus, which is odd for someone who oversees student conduct.

How did I get there? I loved the Trinity Tiger football team. It was the golden era of our Division III team. You could do a TV show about it. Before Roy Hampton, the brash Mike Burton led the Tigers to the playoffs and won the D-III MVP award for his own talents. Even today it is on display in the Bell Center. He was good and he helped coach Roy, who came right after him. Sometimes the team made it hard to support them with their shenanigans. But they were dynamic, on and off the field, filled with colorful characters. I used to love to take my young sons to meet the players on the field after games and they were very kind and gracious to my boys. In one playoff run we set-up speakers on the Heidi lawn to listen to the game as a community. I was there that night to support the team, following a heart-breaking loss, when the buses rolled back to campus. We would have another day. So we thought.

But in 2001 I became the enemy. Later, amid legal wrangling that happened above my level, there was an admission that "mistakes were made" in exchange for being allowed back in the fall of 2002. The other students never came back, but Roy did. I supported that move for purely selfish reasons. I was off the hook for ruining Trinity football.

Then the incredible playoff run happened, and we finally were headed to the title game. I was ecstatic for the University. But it all came crashing down within days, when Roy's arrest was made public. Trinity was lauded for doing the right thing in suspending him. It was in part because of Roy's previous record. Maybe pundits felt good. Virtually no one else did. Coach Steve Mohr had reached his pinnacle only to have the opportunity ripped away. It was devastating.

According to Roy's teammate, and our current coach, Jerheme Urban, it haunted Roy. How could it not. Coach Urban says Roy never got over letting other people down. Imagine if there were social media then. Roy was wildly popular with his team and friends. He was the life of the party and had charisma. Roy passed away in 2013. There would be no redemption in his story and maybe that is why even Trinity skirted it in its announcement. But when Trevone Boykin repeated history, I couldn't do the same.

Years after all of this I would reach out to Roy over email to see how he was doing. I didn't feel sorry for him. I wasn't worried about him. I guess I just wondered about him. We had a nice, brief, cordial exchange. He was very gracious. You learn after awhile that people aren't defined by one act. They are not two-dimensional. We are all the sum of our parts. You appreciate the complexity of people - especially young people. I eventually made peace with the professors who became deeply involved in the shooting case. Time and conversation heal. Hopefully the players from those teams harbor no ill-will against me. But I understand if they do. We lived through an epic Greek tragedy.

The one positive outcome has been that Jerheme Urban was named head coach after Steve Mohr retired. Jerheme is a high-character man. He included Roy in his football camps in Victoria if only to have time to spend with his friend. He supported him when it would have been easy to write him off. The team is rolling again, under his leadership. He is using his own Trinity and NFL experience to shape young men. They make mistakes too. But he has their blind spot, as he did with Roy.

So this January, trailing by a bundle, TCU would follow suit until its now historic comeback, defeating the Oregon Ducks on ESPN in a dramatic double-overtime come from behind victory. They stole our ending. A similar epic comeback by the Tigers would have gone a long way: for Trinity, for Roy Hampton, for Coach Mohr and the team, and even for me.

When Trevone Boykin threw that punch another one landed. Those of us who remember 2002 took one to the gut, again. You know what? It still hurt.

Half full

The Eighth Annual Dean of Students Half Marathon Challenge and Kayla Mire Food Drive is in the books! What a wonderful group of running partners (several shown above at the starting line). We trained from September through the culmination of the Rock 'n' Roll Half Marathon on December 6, 2015. The highlight was running through campus with about 25,000 of our new friends and a very supportive cheering section.Great touch, too, that Trinity alumnus Mark Greene won the full marathon.

We had about 75 people participate in the program this year. Runners ranged from steady participants to those who jumped in near the end after training a lot on their own. The group included students, staff, faculty, alumni, parents, friends, and Rachel's boyfriend Marc. Our charity was the San Antonio Food Bank and the runners and TUVAC collected the equivalent of nearly 15,000 pounds of food ($1 equals ten pounds). The Kayla Mire Food Drive is named for alumna Kayla Mire, who died in 2010 and was an advocate for the homeless.In eight years we have collected nearly two semi trailers of food.

Highlights of our training included a session on running form; a session on running gear; the Alumni Weekend 5K; a Halloween Hill Hell run; the Trinity Turkey Trot; a run around Woodlawn Lake followed by a taco breakfast; and a pasta dinner the night before the race. Kayla Mire's parents attended and Mr. Mire offered a few very touching remarks about Kayla. 

In assessing the program, 85% of respondents said they would do this again. The rest say they are graduating or moving away. Nearly all the students would love to receive a PE credit for the program. Of the 42 respondents, 40 said they would continue to be runners and two were unsure.

Please view the slide show below to gt a sense for the spirit of our runners. They look pretty happy - even in the post race photos. Mark your calendars for December 4, 2016 for the Ninth Annual Challenge.

The Gift Exchange - A Trinity Christmas Story

Trinity Registrar Fred Rodriguez knows a good thing (or two) when he sees it. When he came to Trinity he soon identified one of his employees, Claudette Reese, as "a jewel." She helped him transition during a difficult time for the office. She trained him.

Claudette worked at Trinity for two-and-a-half years, from 1999- 2001. Her time here was cut tragically short by an auto accident that left her in critical condition, and her husband Timothy deceased. The vehicle they were in was hit at an intersection in the Dallas-Fort Worth area on December 6, 2000. Claudette accompanied Tim, who volunteered to participate in a webinar for the Social Security Office. Tim passed away from his injuries on December 28, one day after Claudette's birthday.

Injuries and Healing

That Claudette survived was somewhat of a miracle. The list of injuries is as impressive as it is frightening: three broken ribs, punctured lung, broken clavicle, facial lacerations, fractures to the pelvis, dental injuries, and a shattered elbow. Today Claudette is quick to point out that the most shattering wound of all was losing her husband of 30 years. Fred Rodriguez was concerned that Claudette, who was in critical, wouldn't make it. He says the pain was immense and she was still struggling, physically, a year after the accident and is still recovering some 15 years later. 

Claudette would eventually move home to Austin, where she worked as an administrator at Scott and White Hospital.

There is another...

Jennifer Reese was a student at Southwest Texas State - now Texas State - in San Marcos when she learned of the accident. She was preparing for finals. Her mom still can't believe that she completed all of her finals successfully while traveling back-and-forth and not knowing whether or not her parents would survive through the holiday season. Jennifer went on to graduate in 2003. And it was later that year that Claudette would urge Jennifer to apply for a position at Trinity's Registrars Office. Registrar Rodriguez knew he had struck gold again. Jennifer started at the front desk, became the Graduate Coordinator, and now works as the Degree Audit Coordinator. Jennifer received her MBA in Business and Marketing at Texas State in 2009.

Like Mother, like Daughter

Jennifer had been here before. When she came to visit campus after her mom started here she thought the trees smelled like grape bubble gum. For years after she started she would find other reminders of her mom. "I used to go through old files and would stumble upon things that she had put her mark on," Jennifer told me. Claudette had coordinated classroom reservations and Jennifer would see the notes and pictures she left of the spaces in the on-line reservation software system.

Jennifer says she tries to live up to her perfectionist mother. Rodriguez describes the two as very similar in how they approach their work. They are both driven and eager to get down to business. He says Jennifer is a bit quieter and more serious in her approach. Rodriguez says, "They are extra dedicated, sharp, organized, and detailed. Under their exteriors they have great humor." They are not the same person though. Claudette loves classic rock and gambling junkets - Jennifer, tote bags.

Claudette and Jennifer

Christmas Tidings

Despite their tragedy, Jennifer, her brother and sisters, and Claudette, all celebrate Christmas with enthusiasm.The memory of the Christmas they spent at a private Ronald McDonald House in Dallas in 2000 seems like a long time ago. Jennifer says her mom still enthusiastically decorates, placing a tree in every room.  "Mom still makes sure we get ten presents each," Jennifer says with a wry smile. They reminisce about Tim, especially during the holidays. A scholarship at Texas State bears his name.

Claudette describes Jennifer as methodical, patient, and sensitive. She says Jennifer never forgets her family's tragedy and uses it to focus on the human element of the people she works for and serves. Students wouldn't know what Jennifer went through. She is focused on them when they come to her for assistance. They never know her sense of persistence and courage. Jennifer is proud of her 12 years and hopes to stay on for a long time. She has deeper roots than most as a member of the Trinity family.

This holiday season the Trinity community should be thankful for many things, including Claudette and Jennifer. Claudette says that were it not for the accident she may still very well be here. In many ways, she still is. Merry Christmas!